It is easy to feel defeated when I focus on all the stressors in my life. In 17 days we have to move out of our rental and no offer is on the table for our CA house. There is so much money and labor needed for our new church building. Believing God for big things is easier when the miracle is far off but as deadlines approach, the fear can creep in causing discouragement.
I walked for over an hour this morning. I need that time to allow God to speak to my heart.
I worry if things don’t work out the way I thought then the faith of others may be discouraged. Like my little ones who are really praying our house sells. Or the many who are eagerly awaiting the answer with us or those who have no faith and that this could give them further reason not to believe.
But then I reminded that God does not need me to be his PR manager. 🙂 He is mighty and will reveal himself to those who are seeking him.
I am learning in my Beth Moore bible study (totally perfect timing-thank you God) that God is pleased with my big, bold faith. Bold requests do not offend or anger him but delight him. Just like if my son asked for a baby elephant for his birthday. That request would not upset me. I would actually think how cool it is that he thinks I am able to give such a grand gift.
God’s ways are beyond my understanding. He has good things for us. It is ok that I have more questions than answers.
Even if my prayer is not answered the way I planned- I KNOW that He will provide and He provides more than I could ever imagine or dream.
Jeremy and I are high school sweethearts but our first round of dating ended because I dumped his butt. For no good reason, I just thought we were better as friends. He was devastated. So for the next year I prayed God would send him an awesome Christian girlfriend because I hated to see him so heart broken. I even gave his number out to girls and considered setting him up with a friend.
….. God had other plans. Ironic(God has a sense of humor) that he answered my prayer for him with me. 🙂 Thank God that He did not answer it the way I hoped he would with another girlfriend.
Instead of focusing on the storm that is testing my faith, I want to focus on the one who will get me safely to shore.
I still have sooooo many reasons to sing and praise God.
Even if my prayer is not answered the way I hope- God is still good. God still loves me. He is my savior. He has given me so much already. He has rescued me from a meaningless life. He is given me so much for my heart to sing about. He is still faithful and He will provide even when I don’t know or see the answers.