Ever have something you keep putting off?
Something you are dreading?
One of those things for me is conflict. I want to be emotionally healthy. I want to deal with my baggage. I am learning that emotionally healthy people run towards conflict right away. They don’t hope it goes away by ignoring it. They don’t dance around it. They don’t tell a 3rd party about it but instead go directly to the person that hurt them.
This is NOT my natural response.
I want to RUN.
I want to bury my head in the sand and hope it leaves.
We have about 30 trees in our yard so that means a ton of leaves and pine needles to rake and bag. Last fall we raked but never bagged. So in July we are still dealing with this.
I avoided it.
I dreaded the handwork it would take.
I ignored it.
For some reason my response did not make the leaves disappear. I am finally bagging them up and I am now left with huge dead patches in our lawn.
My avoidance caused decay/death.
I believe that is exactly want unresolved conflict does.
- Unresolved conflict kills relationships
- Unresolved conflict causes relationships to deteriorate
- Unresolved conflict causes marriages to die
- Unresolved conflict causes friendships to decay
- Unresolved conflict numbs the heart so then you can’t feel anything anymore
I am trying to now uproot bitterness promptly through prayer and hard conversations. My hubby has helped me lots with this. He tells me that I gotta have the hard conversation. This is what an emotionally healthy person does and I want to be healthy. I have enough brokenness and ugly in my heart that I don’t need to add more by allowing unresolved conflict to grow foul bitterness in my heart.
- Emotionally Healthy Spirituality
- Emotionally Healthy Spirituality Workbook
- Emotional Intelligence 2.0
- 5 Dysfunctions of a Team (taught me that conflict is not a bad thing to be avoided)